Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Go Big Or Go Home

I was talking with one of the Port Captains yesterday (they provide shore support for the lobster boats), and he told me, in a very conspiratorial tone, that he's thinking of going to a tanning salon. He wants to even out his "dumpster man tan" - which, having grown up in the 'burbs, I didn't even know what that was. Turns out, he is referring to what the rest of us call a "farmer tan," but in the city, it's the sanitation workers that tan around their t-shirts. Who knew?

I thought it was really funny that he was whispering it to me like he was thinking about doing something illegal or immoral. But we are talking about a fisherman, and tanning in a salon is pretty metrosexual for a guy like that.

I laughed and said "You do some random funny stuff, you know that? But seriously, if you're going to tan, you've got to be buck naked. You need a tan butt." He looked at me like I'd lost my mind.

"If you're going to do random funny stuff, you need to commit to it. Go big or go home!"

I'm thinking about opening a diner in Amarillo with the help of a married man or a biker dude (while wearing lame' hot pants, can't forget the lame' hot pants), and this guy is worried about baring his butt in a tanning bed.


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